The Adventures of Artemis Fowl the III
by SehlatWhisperer
Summary: Everyone knows that the Fowl legacy will continue on through the adventures of young Artemis Fowl III. Artemis/Holly Minerva/Kelp. YaY! Wedding up! Coming soon: The first escapade of III.
1. Authors Note

((Hey!

Look, I'm sorry! I always forget to introduce myself or hint at the story when I write my first chapter. I have read way too many stories that start without any idea where they are going, and I myself do not enjoy them. So, I plan to TRY to make this chapter one. If I win, I'm a genius. If I lose I'm insane. That's the way—Sorry. I randomly quote Arty…))

ANYWAY: The story that _hopefully_ you will be reading is the "Tom Sawyer" style trials of Artemis Fowl III. OK! So we all know that Artemis will end up with Holly, except for those who pair him with others (Opal, Minerva, OC, etc.). In my rendition of how it will go down, Artemis ends up with Holly, they have a semi-magic son, and they live happily ever after in the Fowl manor. Although both Peter and Arthur are fine names for a boy, I would like you to guess what Artemis would name his son. Any ideas? No? I'm thinking Artemis Fowl III to continue the Fowl line. Artemis III is no normal boy as his heritage would suggest. He has hints of sarcasm, a light sense of humor, an odd desire for silence and a love of both magic and adventure.

As we will see later (chapter three, four, so on and so forth) Artemis III is far more social than his father, but not quite as open as his mother. His best friends include the strong Tomas Butler (Juliet's son), the wild Amanda Kelp (Minerva and Trouble's daughter), the hilarious Diggums' Twins (Mulch's children), and the talented Athena (Foaly's daughter).

What Artemis Fowl story could exist without a complete cast of villains? Opal's vengeful nephew, a dangerous, psychopathic 12 year old, and quite a few random annoyances in the form of summer camp pests…

So chill out and wait for your weekly (if I'm lucky) installment of _The Adventures of Artemis Fowl III_!

P.S. To the REVIEWERS! YAY! ILY!!! You keep me writing! The fastest way to end my fic is to stop reviewing! SO REVIEW PLEASE, R&R!!!

P.P.S. OK, so I'm starting with Minerva Problems, then I'm going to do the wedding, then I'm going to skip to the main story, because most of us know how babies are made. If you don't then it doesn't matter much in my story, so you can read it too!


	2. Minerva and Pluto

Disclaimer: I don't own Artemis fowl. I do own my chess puns!

**Why Minerva Didn't Work**

*15 years ago*

It had been three months since Artemis and Minerva had become an item. It had been two months, three weeks and six days since Artemis had been clearly the best of the league of intelligent Mud Men and Mud Women of this century.

Artemis Fowl had not synchronized his girlfriend timeline with the timeline of the global chess tournament, and this would prove to cost him dearly.

After being advanced to the finals, under the pseudonym Cheiko Mait, he met his opponent face to face, Kanga Pien, whose long blond hair had reminded him severely of Minerva's. Tie after tie, they were instructed to share the trophy.

Kanga Pien called three weeks after to ask Cheiko Mait to the Ball that her father was hosting at the Chateau.

After a couple of fights on whether or not Pluto should be reinstated as a planet, Artemis ended the evening with a bowl of punch dumped over his head.

He left, being forced to drive himself as Juliet, his chaperone, was having a very good time with Madame Ko's nephew, who too had failed the body guard test and quit the family business.

He was still trying to pick out the authentic fruity bits from his suit as he arrived home…

His chemestry with her had been altered on a molecular level by the punch.

Didja Catch the puns? check mate and king pin??? I hope you did! WRITE A REVIEW SO I KNOW IF YOU GOT THEM!

I will put 1 pun in my next chapter per review for this chapter!! If you write a flame, telling me no more puns, I will quit the puns. But if you like the puns, save them! Save the puns!


	3. The Wedding last intro

The romance between Holly and Arty was inevitable, after Minerva was-er- neutralized by a certain dry cleaning bill sent by a certain punch-covered genius.

*14 years ago*

Artemis and Holly got back together before one could say "Fairy" (though if you did, Foaly would be forced to mind-wipe you).

Their wedding followed in due course, complete with multiple odd events.

Genius guest Minerva (she still was a family friend, although a far less wealthy one considering the price of the wrecked suit) would not stop flirting with Kelp.

Juliet, maid of honor, had brought Kevin, the nephew she had met at the Ball last year. The two had eloped, their relationship layered with adventures.

The Diggums' (Mulch, his new wife, and two children, Marissa and Mulch Jr.) made up their rest of the wedding party, with Foaly tin-capped and proud as best man.

Of course, one first wonders at the absence of Butler. He missed the wedding, insisting that he would be watching from afar, and blatantly refusing to answer any of Artemis's questions.

The wedding began simply, observing the fairy tradition of no flower girl. A flower girl was "a waste of living beings" according to the book.

They had positioned a white screen behind the altar, made from thin rice paper. The white isle was laced with rice paper giving the autumn Fowl manor the picturesque wedding location.

The ring bearer, little Mulch Jr., walked up the podium and after a long ceremony (and lots of tears by both Artemis's parents and the wedding party) they placed rings on each other's fingers and kissed, in love.

Authors note and disclaimer:

I WISH I OWED ARTY AND HOLLY! And everyone else… But I do not.

YAY! Time to get onto the fun escapades of only-child Artemis Fowl III!

R&R!!


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